The NFL’s Disease Of Dumb, With Carolina On My Mind

DJ Moore Panthers
Mensa Award Winner DJ Moore

It’s not often you manage to win and lose the game for your team on the same play, so kudos to D.J. Moore of the Carolina Panthers. An incredible catch, followed by a dumb celebration penalty, which led to a series of unfortunate events for both Lemony Snicket and the Panthers.

Some say the refs shouldn’t have called the penalty, some say it’s a dumb rule, some just say Moore is an idiot. Some even say say say.

That was a weird friendship. Which is strange because Michael Jackson was such a normal guy. They also did a song called “The Girl Is Mine,” where they, I guess, fight over a girl. We didn’t look very closely at things in the ’80s, we just liked colors and shapes.

But back to that idiot D.J. Moore. Yes, the rules are stupid. But this one goes back a long way. You think Moore is the first to make a game-winning play and then blow it by taking off his helmet? That same shit happened 20 years ago to the Browns (who else?). You can Google it, but you’ll need to specify Dwayne Rudd, otherwise you’ll get something about Jadeveon Clowney throwing a shoe at someone, another shining moment for Cleveland football.

Of course, the NFL wouldn’t even need to have such penalties in the books if the players didn’t act like flaming jackasses after every good play. Like after an interception when half the defense runs into the end zone and starts mime paddling a canoe. Or the Marvel-worthy posing and prancing over stopping a runner for no gain on second down, only to give up a touchdown on the next play. Looking good, Billy Ray!

The coaches are morons too. None of them puts a stop to this. This shit keeps happening! How about when players toss the ball away BEFORE they enter the end zone? Or close enough that the replay guys have to check it out while everyone wonders if DeSean Jackson should be in the concussion protocol. Or an Eddie Murphy movie.

And we keep watching! What is wrong with us?? How do we fight back? The NFL is even mightier than Sauron’s ring of power.

As a defensive coordinator, Gandalf was legendary for daring teams to run the ball against him.

How do we as fans put a stop to this when our only weapon is Twitter?

Granted, social media shaming has it’s charms. But still.

I just want an end to the dumb. Which is also how my wife phrased it when she filed for divorce.

As always, thanks for playing!

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