The Bills Should Have Lost To The Rams, But Not For The Reason You Might Think


It has nothing to do with what happened on the field at SoFi (SoFi? Sci-Fi? SyFy? Whatever. Corporate branding isn’t ruining sports at all.) Stadium when the Rams made us all wonder how the hell they just beat the Bengals in the Super Bowl (and then we saw the Bengals/Steelers game and that part suddenly made more sense). On the field, the Rams took a sack of nickels to the nuts.

The Bills totally deserved to win the actual game, it’s not that. The problem is that Buffalo is already the Super Bowl favorite, and they do not want that kind of pressure. Trust me. They need a loss badly. As it stands, anything less than winning the Super Bowl this year will be a massive disappointment. Like going to the Dolphins game and parking next to the guy who forgot to turn off his grill.

I know what you’re thinking. How has this never happened before, and who ordered the well-done smokehouse burger? Regardless, fun time at the ballpark for everyone in Lot D.

But back to the Bills. They’ve never won a Super Bowl. Like ever. They did go to four in a row in the early ’90s though. They lost the first one by one point because their kicker missed wide by a yard on the game-winning field goal attempt. And that was by far the best outcome of their four appearances. So, yeah.

Buffalo waited twenty years for this window. They had to wait for Tom Brady to leave New England for this to even be possible because he always left them looking like they parked in Lot D. They celebrated when he moved south, and the Bills have quickly taken advantage of his absence. But if they survive the AFC gauntlet this year, they are likely to see Tampa Tom again in the Super Bowl. Guess how that ends.

That’s not even all his rings. These are just the ones made out of Buffalo tears. And after Week One does anyone really think any team besides the Bucs is coming out of the NFC?

The Bills need to lay low for awhile. They need a few good losses to lower expectations, or this could be the most painful thing since someone made Wilt Chamberlain do a Conan movie.

That’s right, the man scored 100 points in an NBA game. But now you’ll only remember this.

Come on, Buffalo. Think this through. You think you can take the heat, Josh Allen? So did Cameron in “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.” How’d that work out?

Go Bills!

As always, thanks for playing!

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